Informal ways to support the development of confident talking

Informal ways to support the development of confident talking

Gradually introduce questions on a one-to-one basis at the child or young person’s pace.

Question sequence

Chatty comments with rhetorical questions that need no answer (eg ‘This is fun, isn’t it!’, ‘I wonder what this is?)

‘Show me’/’Which one?’ requests that can be answered by pointing

‘Yes/no’ questions that can be answered by nodding or shaking the head

‘X or Y?’ questions that can be answered with one word Simple questions that can be answered with one word Factual questions that can be answered with a phrase

Leave open-ended and non-factual questions until later

(eg ‘How’s it going?’, ‘Why did you do that?’, ‘What do you pull back if they think?)

Note: comments always outweigh questions!

Talk through a parent or friend

- Use parents or friends as ‘go-betweens’ to prepare the child for talking to you
- Provide space for them to talk together, eg ‘Why don’t you two go into the book corner to discuss your plan?’ (Keep your distance and/or pretend to be occupied.)
- Ask questions through the friend or parent, eg ‘Could you ask Pria where she put her lunchbox?’, ‘I expect you’ve got a favourite character- Mum, do you know Joe’s favourite one?’ (Prime parents to redirect questions rather than answer for the )
- Ask the child to communicate through their friend or parent, eg ‘Tell Ben whose table you want to be on and we’ll get it sorted.’ (Move away or turn away initially, so that the conversation is private and gradually get closer until the child talks to their parent or friend in your presence.)

Parents can help their child to answer unexpected questions

- - Give the child five seconds to respond, then repeat or rephrase the question if necessary.
  - If there is no response after another five seconds, casually move on or change the subject, eg ‘We’ll let you know later’, ‘Have you got this style in size three?’ Don’t answer for the child!

HELPING YOUNG CHILDREN TO SPEAK AT SCHOOL

Early years staff members have seen an increase in the number of children who talk happily and noisily to close family but say much less outside the home.

Children need to be eased into new settings gently, so that initial reluctance to speak does not become an intense fear of speaking.

Why is this happening? While family life gets busier, children are going into school younger and may not be ready to separate from parents and talk confidently to strangers. Some children are particularly sensitive to change and anything new. Well-meaning attempts to encourage speech can actually make them more anxious about talking.

Turn this worrying trend around now! By expecting /esswhile supporting more, children are allowed to succeed and develop the confidence to take small steps forward.

Be positive and reassuring

+ As soon as it becomes clear that children are remaining silent in response to questions, have a private chat to reassure them. Say you know they want to talk but are finding it difficult at the moment. Tell them not to worry because talking will get easier and they don’t have to talk straightaway. Ask them to concentrate on having fun and then it will be easier to be brave and have a go.

+ Make sure that no adult applies pressure to talk using bribery, persuasion or negative comments. Neverforce children to say ‘Hello’, ‘Please’, ‘Thank you’, etc. Social conventions are extremely difficult for anxious children.

Build confidence

+ Look out for children who are stiff or frozen in their facial expression or body movements.

This is usually caused by extreme anxiety. Focus on physical activity, laughter and general noise making to help them relax.

+ Include plenty of activities which involve children moving, singing or talking in unison.

+ Adopt a self-registration system, or repeat ‘Is here?’, so that the whole class gets to know each other as they answer in unison each time.

+ Parents can reduce the anxiety of separation by giving children something of theirs to look after before they leave. Arrange an early return so that parents can join in and make the last part of the session a positive experience.

+ Welcome parents as volunteer helpers for the whole group, not just their child.

+ Encourage non-English-speaking parents to learn and use English at school, to show their child that it’s OK to have a go and make mistakes.

+ Organise playground activities and make sure each quiet child has a friend at playtime.

Encourage parents to invite the same children home to play.

+ Give extra smiles and attention when children try anything new. Do things with children or make things easier, rather than doing things forthem.

+ Ensure that children can access the toilet, drinking water and first aid without asking.

Gradually facilitate speech, being guided by the child’s response

+ Encourage al/children to record messages for each other at home to add to their photographs on a computer or to share with recording devices such as Talking Tins®.

+ Assign an adult to befriend and play with quiet children for short periods of time.

+ Don’t ask direct questions while building rapport. Instead, chat in the style of a running commentary, with pauses so that children can join in when they feel ready: “Wow, look how ta11 you made your tower!”; “I wonder if that’s a horse … or maybe it’s a dog … “; “This is fun, isn’t it?”. Be prepared to do all the talking for a while!

+ When the child gestures (eg nods or points), talk back as if they spoke to you.

+ When children are relaxed enough to laugh, smile, nod and shake their heads, help them answer questions by providing a choice: “What’s this on your tree – are they

apples or cherries?” Smile and allow a full five seconds for them to answer. If they don’t reply, move on the conversation in a positive way: “They look very tasty!” If children struggle to answer near other people, only use the choice technique one-to-one.If they tense up, even on a one-to-one basis, return to commentary-style chat until they relax again.

+ When children speak, praise their ideas or the way they joined in, rather than the fact that they spoke: “Hey, you chose your book really quickly today!”

+ Once children have begun to talk, turn gestures into speech by seeking clarification: “I can see you nodding. Does that mean you want milk or juice?”; “You’re pointing over there, are you showing me Tommy or Max?”; “You’re shaking your head, does that mean you want to play outside or stay here?”

Do some investigation

+ Ask parents which language is spoken at home, how much the child speaks with family and friends, and whether they have any concerns about their child’s pronunciation or abiIity to understand or speak in sentences.

+ Share the above advice on facilitating speech if the child is quiet with family or friends.

+ Let parents know that you are very pleased with how their child is settling in and that you are working on building their confidence, so that they can do as well with you as they do at home.

+ Make sure that parents are not putting pressure on the child by telling them they must speak at school or with relatives because this wilI increase separation anxiety and stop the child looking forward to school and social events.

+ Seek advice about bilingualism if appropriate.

+ Ask for advice from the local speech and language therapy service if language development appears to be delayed.

+ If the above advice has been followed for six weeks, and the child is speaking much more at home than at school, the child could have a condition called selective mutism (SM). Continue this advice while seeking information about SM for home and school.

Suitable children’s books

Penguin by Polly Dunbar (2007), Walker Books.

Little by Little by Amber Stewart (2008), Oxford University Press.

Lamb Says Boo! by Katherine Sully (2010), Alligator Books Ltd.

Additional resources

Talking Tin . Talking Products Ltd, www.talkingproducts.co.uk.

Supporting Quiet Children: Exciting Ideas and Activities to Help ‘Reluctant Talkers’ Become ‘Confident Talkers’ by Maggie Johnson and Michael Jones (2012), Lawrence Educational.

The Selective Mutism Resource Manual, 2nd edition, by Maggie Johnson and Alison Wintgens (2016), Speechmark Publishing Ltd.